As my lonely, numbered days continue to slip by,
I think of you because you are the only thing that makes me feel alive.
My love for you reminds me that I have a soul.
It reminds me that there is a beating heart under this skin.
So alone, I stay with no place to feel at peace.
I am an outcast with nowhere to fit in.
Oh! But when I am near you,
I feel the warmth of home!
When you look into my eyes,
you set my soul on fire.
The soul that is alive because of the idea of you.
The irony of our friendship cuts the blood from my very skin.
Your addictions cloud your vision of the true reality that stares you in the face.
Your addictions kill us both but it is my own that is the true murderer.
For my addiction is you.
Will you love me? Oh you could care less!
Our temporary highs hold our lives at bay.
When they are gone, conviction burns deep through layers of our sin.
Where is our savior? When will this end?
Oh how I long for the day when the sound of your name
doesn’t make my heart race.
The day when your smile won’t turn my insides into
birds the flutter around my rib cage.
Until then I must repent of the sweetness of your sin.
I must bury myself in prayer
and wait for the promise to be fulfilled.
Only then will my soul truly be alive
and my heart truly at peace.
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